Lately I have observed a post about cancer on the timeline of several of my Facebook friends. I wrote this a few days after my mom's battle with cancer was over. From where I stand, cancer is still an ugly disease that robs life in some form from both those who ultimately succumb to its effects as well as those who survive it.
08/27/14
If you had asked me a few weeks ago, I would have railed against the indignities and suffering inflicted by cancer as it slowly squeezes the life from its victims, but what I witnessed yesterday might have changed at least one aspect of my perspective.
Don’t get me wrong. Yesterday I was so very disappointed at how quickly the light had already started to fade from my mother’s eyes that had just been there 5 days earlier as she taught me how to balance the ledger in the red binder. While she still sat in her recliner, now she had to be helped even to sit up. She needed someone to hand her the water in order to take a sip, to pat her back and help her as she coughed, to give her medication, to take care of all of her needs. And that was just what was happening……
But, there were so many other aspects that I also witnessed…… Who knew that the brother who in his younger days had a talent for mysteriously having things break in his hands, would be the son who expertly and intuitively was able to lovingly care for Mom? Or how about the baby sister who jumps in and does just the right thing at just the right moment: like kneeling down to hold Mom’s hand, or saying a kind word, or taking a walk with her niece? And then that niece/granddaughter who uses her RN expertise to care for her grandmother as well as teach the rest of us how to care for her? Or how the other granddaughters leave work to come stay and care for their beloved grandmother?
The point is, this ugly cancer has given each of us a way to love on Mom and each other as well as allowing us to see and experience how others love on her and us as well. Mom is experiencing love in a way that simply would not be able to happen were it not for her condition. This extremely difficult and ugly journey has given us this beautiful opportunity to love her in both words and actions.
For me, this nasty cancer has also allowed me to watch how my aunts and uncles come to our assistance at the hint of a call, or even without a call as well as to see the usually hidden tears of love flow freely. I have marveled at the home visit of an attorney so that my parents could sign the paperwork that puts their affairs in order. I have visited with the pastor who came and gave Mom and us communion. I have partaken of the delivered food that seems to multiply like the loaves and fish that Jesus broke for the 5,000. I have worked with my brother and sister who only want what is best for my parents and unselfishly give whatever assistance they can to make that happen.
So, is cancer and its effects ugly? Most certainly: Yes!!! BUT, in the midst of this horrible ugliness, there is the beauty of love in action: for my mom and dad as well as for my family. Perhaps the ugly, horrible part of my mom’s journey is also an illustration of Romans 8:28:
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.
So, for me, while I may encourage those around me to continue to fight that ugly cancer, I also aspire to seek out and take note of the love and beauty and hope that is evident there as well.
Here's to pressing on and noticing God at work, even amidst the ugliness that life dishes out....
